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  phase 3: chaos kai nomos


Category 3: Expiatio

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  1. Millennia
  2. White
  3. Syllogy VI: Requiem

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  Subsequent Pages - Poems  

Phil John Kneis:
Eichwalde, December 31st 1999 - P#113

The days go by,
Along they fly,
Each day, each year
They pass so near -

The time goes by
And sees each cry,
Each laugh, each thought
That has been taught.

The days go on,
Time can't be won,
It flows away
Each single day.

The days we count
To numbers bound,
Their names are known -
Their truth - their own.

A thousand years -
All filled with tears,
All filled with joy,
Both frank and coy.

And more to come -
In all its sum,
All time is one,
All things are done.

December 31st, 1999

Phil John Kneis:
Eichwalde, December 30th 2000 - P#141

Bright the sight of snow out there
Ice now light's reflection bearing
Trees now naked, cold and hurt,
Structures glowing from within,
Skies so laden, clouds so full,
Death they bring to nature all -
Sea of whiteness, don't you see?
Bright the sights and hurt the eye
Bright and white and pure and cold
And beyond, beneath it all -
Earth so screaming, frozen, stiff,
Whiteness cursed with deadly spell -
And this beauty
Carries hell
Carries terror deep within
Darkness bearing, white a lie -
Dazzling all before it strikes
White of angels not, of death -
Bright the sight
And dark inside
Beauty edged
So perfectly.

December 30th, 2000

Phil John Kneis:
Ahrenshoop / Palma de Mallorca / Eichwalde / Berlin, September 24th, 1999 - January 20th 2000 - P#114

Venit hora, et nunc est,
quando mortui audient vocem Filii Dei:
et qui audierint, vivent.
John 5, 25-29

Absorpta est mors in victoria.
Ubi est, mors, victoria tua?
Ubi est, mors, stimulus tuus?
1 Cor 15, 55




The paths here filled with tears and cries,
The words so full of truth and lies,
The sounds so shrill, they all consume,
The sights so big they fill each room,
The smells so thick and fat it hurts,
The people here just seem like herds,
The paths they take to nowhere lead,
And nothing is their only creed,
To nothing turn their eyes down here,
To nothing turn their hope and fear,
From nothing they inspired are,
And nowhere find it, near nor far,
And shattered dreams they carry but,
And only will return to mud -
To ashes falls what from them came,
To ashes falls what lost the flame,
To ashes all in every part,
To ashes torn just every heart -
In ashes truth then they assume -
With ashes filled just every tomb.


Requiem aeternam dona eis, Domine, et lux perpetua luceat eis.
Te decet hymnus, Deus, in Sion, et tibi reddetur votum in Ierusalem:
Exaudi orationem meam, ad te omnis caro veniet.
Requiem aeternam dona eis, Domine, et lux perpetua luceat eis.

What once so troubled, rest it may,
What once so restless, may it stay,
What once so shaken, hold it still,
What once so empty you will fill,
What once was sad rejoice now will,
What grew to good please do not kill,
What darkened was give light again,
What once was lost do give a plan,
What once so restless, may it stay,
What once so troubled, rest it may.
Eternal rest do give to them,
Eternal light they'll see again -
And praise to thee will be once more -
And Zion finally will soar,
Jerusalem, dear bride, give praise!
And shine you will on sacred ways -
O hear, my Lord, what I now pray,
To you all flesh shall find its way -
In you, eternal rets will be -
In you, eternal truth we'll see.

Kyrie eleison
Christe eleison
Kyrie eleison

Amongst all sorrow, 'mongst all pain,
All crying sadness all in vain,
All desperation - nothingness,
Exasperation - no one's bless,
All shouts and tremors - have no worth,
All threats and war cries - just from Earth,
Complaints, denials - have to fail,
All swearing, cursing - no avail,
Away all thoughts which lead to nil,
Away all deeds that us just kill,
Away what kills the soul, the heart,
Away what apprehends no start,
Away what just an end us shows,
Away what no one never knows -
Have mercy, Lord, and stand us by,
Have mercy, Christ, and hear us cry,
Have mercy, Lord, and hear our plea,
Have mercy, Christ, let truth us see,
Have mercy, Lord, don't let us fall,
Lord Christ, have mercy with us all.

III. - Graduale
Requiem aeternam dona eis, Domine,
et lux perpetua luceat eis.
In memoria aeterna erit iustus:
Ab auditione mala non timebit.

All years and years and years now past,
The tears and tears and tears don't last,
In all our crying peace will set,
In all our mourning peace we'll get,
In all the trouble, heart-felt ache,
In all the aching hidden sake,
In all, now broken, truth sets in,
In all, now shown, a deeper kin,
All tears gone by - and rest now gained,
All fears passed by, remembered, faint,
The time to come comes nothing near,
The time to come is not to fear -
The just has not to fear at all -
The just not part of endless fall,
The just won't fear what him awaits,
The just approaches then the gates -
But humbly, knowing, all he won
Is not his own, just built upon
The grace received from highest source,
Just following the Lord's own course.


Dies irae, dies illa
Solvet saeclum in favilla:
Teste David cum Sybilla.

And shaken now the world will be,
That every smallest part can see
Where lies no substance and no thought -
And what a fight needs to be fought -
The tremors make their way through all,
And every tiny bit will fall,
Will fall it all and fall apart -
There's no beginning nor a start,
No point in time this day will be,
Nor easily it is to see -
This day of wrath, this day of all,
This day when rises highest call,
This day of all - each single one,
The world needs fall in silent stun.
Each day the truth is made us clear,
Each day the choice is brought us near -
Each day the plea of truth strikes through,
The end is near, each day anew -
And all arrives at single choice -
And all depends on single voice.

Quantus tremor est futurus,
Quando iudex est venturus,
Cuncta stricte discussurus!

And tremble will the world then sheer,
The world will tremble out of fear,
The tremors filling every part,
The tremors with no end nor start -
Will shake the world and twist her 'round,
Turn upside down what up was bound,
Will turn downside what once faced up -
Now see it, world, your time is up!
The days you had - where did they go?
The days you had - where do they show?
Did use you them - turn them to light?
Turn them to everlasting right?
The judge has come - His see will rule -
The see but is no chair nor stool,
The cross it is the judge hangs on,
The cross with which He us has won,
Has won us for the brightest side,
Has won us; did we use it right?
What have we done - what is the case?
Has not He shown us better ways?

Tuba, mirum spargens sonum
Per sepulchra regionum,
Coget omnes ante thronum.

The sounds of light tear down the night,
The shades of darkness take their flight,
They scramble hastily away,
But there's no single place to stay -
The final days have now begun,
No place to hide, no place to run,
No place to hide from sins now past,
No place to hide from failures vast,
No place to run, no place to hide -
To this one place now to abide,
At this one time now to decide,
At this one moment's greatest tide -
The streams of time and space unfold,
The mysteries of life are told,
The past revealed, the time is now -
Now is the time to rightly vow -
This neverwhere, this neverthen,
This everywhere, this everywhen -
The fates together now will flow,
The truth unmasked they now will show.

Mors stupebit et natura,
Cum resurget creatura,
Iudicanti responsura.

And death now takes a break to see,
With nature, both in union be -
They stand amazed to hear the call,
The call which now extends to all:
Extends to all, with no one left,
Extends without the smallest cleft,
It reaches all and lets them see -
And no one now the truth can flee,
The time of choice is far now gone,
The time of wishes long upon -
No more to look to left, to right,
No more to go - the bonds too tight:
These bonds applies not someone else
But inner sin and deepest lies -
So once at last we'll honest be
And once at last the truth we'll see
And all creation will respond
From places near and far beyond -
The judge they hear and answer must:
All lies to nothingness will bust.

Liber scriptus proferetur,
In quo totum continetur,
Unde mundus iudicetur.

And all contained from all our lives,
And all contained of him who thrives,
And all contained of him who's lost -
And all contained whose paths we crossed,
And all contained what deeds we've done,
And all contained the paths we've gone -
The book of life is opened then,
Its message well destroy us can -
But, hopefully, a single spark,
A spark of light amongst the dark,
Will be in it, and caused us by -
And all our deeds will then us tie,
Tie us into the paths to come -
Decide, what paths we are to run -
Decide the speed, the place, the time -
Decide if we to laugh or whine -
The judge awaits the truth to tell,
The truth that us might then propel,
Propel us high into the light -
But also into void it might!

Iudex ergo cum sedebit
Quidquid latet, apparebit:
Nil inultum remanebit.

The judge - once seated - starts the game,
And now there's nothing but His name -
His name the key to truth just is,
The key to everlasting bliss
As well to everlasting pain -
The task is simple, straight and plain:
Whatever lies seemed once to hold
Will now as masquerades unfold -
The deeds they carried, all will go,
The things accomplished - just like so,
And all what hidden once - lays bare,
And all we didn't like - take care!
And all we did not want to see
And all we didn't then agree -
And all which used to go too far
And all which thought itself a star
And all which deviated then
Now needs to join the path again -
So all that's sinful must repent -
And all to Him then needs to bend.

Quid sum miser tunc dicturus?
Quem patronum rogaturus,
Cum vix iustus sit securus?

And so I look, want answers find
And then of course a place to hide -
But what then should I say, what hope -
When but not even just men cope
With all the fate that's put on them?
While from the light we are to stem,
But darkness flows just into all,
Is forcing us to steady fall -
There is no time no place at all
That we'd be safe from darkest call -
What patron I should seek out here?
Aren't they themselves just filled with fear?
And when they aren't - what pride they show!
And through their pride themselves to grow
Believe - but though instead they sink -
They sink because they crushed the link,
The link which humbly all connects
And with benevolence affects
Just those who think themselves not great -
While pride just closes every gate.

Rex tremendae maiestatis,
Qui salvandos salvas gratis,
Salva me, fons pietatis.

There is no king on Earth but you,
And outside you, no thing is true -
And outside you, no life exists -
And life itself, in all its twists,
Goes on because you want it to -
There is no worldly might but you.
The darkness will recede in light,
The darkness has no smallest might,
You'd crush it with the slightest word -
Could make yourself get eas'ly heard.
But where would we then need to be?
What if we had to all the key?
No free a choice we then would have!
And no more truth the world then gave!
There'd be no point in life at all -
There'd be no point in any call -
The choice is now which stand to take
And what alliances to make -
O save me if in this I failed,
Who savest those who had prevailed!

Recordare, Iesu Pie,
Quod sum causa tuae viae:
Ne me perdas illa die.

So yours the grace and pity all,
While Babel's tower far too tall,
We're stacking sin upon each sin,
And do it with a slyish grin -
We think us mighty, think us smart,
We think that each and ev'ry part
Of us is worth to worship man -
While otherwise, none of us can
Indeed yet even see what's true -
And so, no single one but You
It is who can then set us free -
O Lord, Son, Father, hear our plea!
O Lord, Great Spirit, grant us peace!
Us from the darkest grip release!
Afraid we are, afraid we all -
Afraid that here on fateful shoal
Our souls get lost and don't find home -
So tell us just we're not alone -
We feel it with each, every breath -
The thoughts of us but killed you have.

Quaerens me, sedisti lassus:
Redemisti crucem passus:
Tantus labor non sit cassus.

But we're the object of your work,
And though, we just around here lurk,
Pretending not to know a thing,
And not to show whose praise to sing
And not to know what time will be -
And not to know that all we see
Is just reflection of your cause -
So why don't we just sit and pause?
The mysteries of life revealed,
The mysteries of love are feeled,
The love you all the time us give -
The love through which we all can live -
The love, just answered not at all,
The love which brought this steady fall,
The love we answered with your loss -
The Son of Man we put to cross -
What was our scheme, you turned around:
From our hate you love allowed,
The answer we don'ts seem to stand, -
But aren't we in the promised land?

Iuste iudex ultionis,
Donum fac remissionis
Ante diem rationis.

Just Judge, o spare thy vengèance,
O Lord, let pity lead your hands,
Redemption seeking, are we here --
With deepest soul we know you're near,
In deepest union, thine we are,
You stand beside us, not afar,
Eternal rest do give to them,
As we are part of great your plan,
Redemption we are asking for,
Redemption at our deepest core,
Redeem from sins us we can't see,
Redeem from truth we always flee,
Redeem us from what wrong we did,
Redeem when we from you had hid',
Redeem the words and deeds so void,
Redeem when we these words enjoyed,
O save us, heal us, give us strength,
That we may go the way, all length,
Before the day of reckoning
Removed shall be the deadly sting!

Ingemisco, tamquam reus:
Culpa rubet vultus meus:
Supplicanti parce, Deus.

And so I cry and moan in fears,
My face now filled with silent tears,
The dreams deep down with darkness filled,
The hidden hopes are almost killed,
And fire walks with me once more,
A fire from the darkest core,
The fire darkness sends with might,
This fire, holding us so tight,
This fire, darkening each night,
This fire all of us must fight -
This purgatory makes you see
Which one of us with you to be -
This day of wrath, this day of all,
This day where sky and earth will fall,
This day all worldly stuff destroyed,
This day, all thinking goes to void,
I grown as one condemned will do,
My face will blush from sins not few,
So this suppliant now do spare
And take us then into your care.

Qui Mariam absolvisti,
Et latronem exaudisti,
Mihi quoque spem dedisti.

But hope hast given You to me,
Hast heard so many sinners' plea,
Hast given hope, redemption all,
However deep had seen their fall,
Saint Mary Magdalen you heard,
About the thief you even cared,
About the people on the street,
About the people you would meet,
About each ev'ry one at all
Who willing was to hear your call -
So why should we now be afraid?
Afraid to suffer diff'rent fate?
Hast given hope throughout the days -
However fragile hope then stays -
Nowhere a place you are not there,
Nowhere a person you don't care,
Nowhere a space without your breath,
Nowhere the world your word not hath -
In every darkness is your light,
And be it faint, it's worth a fight.

Preces meae non sunt dignae:
Sed tu bonus fac benigne,
Ne perenni cremer igne.

And all my pleas they have no worth -
No worth have I since then my birth,
Not worthy am I to get heard -
And all my waters darkly stirred,
My hope in you is set alone -
My hope that you up on the throne
A reign do'st lead that worth its name -
That not you send the deadly flame
But love, compassion, charity
To all of us just clear to see -
A reign of terror not - of peace -
A reign that will at once appease
All fear, all pain, all evil ways,
That all in it the same not stays,
That all transformed into sublime,
That all the space and all the time
Relieved from duty, free from pain -
But not it all shall be in vain!
My prayers, late they come - but true,
And all the words go through and through.

Inter oves locum praesta,
Et ab haedis me sequestra,
Statuens in parte dextra.

Amongst the sheep a place me give,
That from your counsel I may live,
Amongst thine folks me place provide,
And safe and sound from times own tide,
Amongst the right and just me place -
And lead me through the brightest ways -
Your judgement mine shall be all day,
Your judgement mine forever stay -
Amongst thine people put my soul,
That you will be my only goal -
The goats me spare and all that's wrong,
All wrongs evade I try so strong,
I try so hard - try I in vain?
I see it written here too plain -
My hopes are mine, my ways still too,
And all the thoughts that ever flew
To me in all my darkest night -
Thou art my one and only light,
My shepherd, guiding me right home,
With you, I'm nevermore alone.

Confutatis maledictis,
Flammis acribus addictis:
Voca me cum benedictis.

The flames reach down and all they catch,
The flames seek innermost their match,
The flames seek darkness like their own,
A dark and burning, hate-filled tone,
They seek revenge in all their eyes,
They seek the grandest of all lies -
They seek all vanity at once,
They seek all who off light now runs,
They seek all darkest wish so clear,
They seek all terror and all fear,
They seek all those who help not did,
All those, their evil fire lit,
They seek the mindless, evil mood,
They seek all those they just have screwed,
They seek the darkest dark of weed -
So they these flames again will feed -
O spare me those, my Lord of grace,
How ever once I joined the maze -
Have mercy now, all deeds are done,
The time is now! The hours run.

Oro supplex et acclinis,
Cor contritum quasi cinis:
Gere curam mei finis.

The time is now - and here I stand,
My fate is drawn from this your hand,
My heart is trembling here with fear -
But more than that, my guilt is clear -
The things I did that were not right,
The things from which I took my flight,
All good I once refused to do,
All mindless babbling I fled to,
All things unsaid, all things too clear,
All that to you not brought me near,
All that from you me took apart,
All that just broke your honest heart,
All thoughts that yours not matched by will,
All thoughts of yours I used to kill,
All things I see now clearly here,
I'm struck with it, astounded sheer,
O won't you tear me now apart!
Why can't there be another start!
The things I did I clearly see -
My end is here - in you it be.

Lacrimosa dies illa,
Qua resurget ex favilla
Iudicandus homo reus.
Huic ergo parce, Deus:
Pie Iesu Domine,
Dona eis requiem. Amen.

O day of tears, of tears this day!
What am I now to you to say,
As guilty man I come to thee,
That guilt of mine here clear to see -
I see it now, I see now clear -
Your voice I finally now hear
To which to listen I refused -
Of that I now will be accused
And rightly so - there is no doubt -
And silent grows who used to shout.
My mouth now closes, ears are wide -
O see, my Lord, all this my plight!
Dear Jesus, merciful you are -
I trust you - nothing's now ajar -
The tears I shed then dry you will,
My broken heart with joy to fill,
Eternal rest and peace provide,
And placest me just to your right -
So be it, all now comes just to its end -
And peace to all is to be sent.


Domine Iesu Christe, Rex gloriae,
Libera animas omnium fidelium defunctorum
de poenis inferni et de profundo lacu:
Libera eas de ore leonis, ne absorbeat eas tartarus, ne cadant in obscurum.

O King of Glory, peace them grant,
Deliver them now from the hand
Death has already laid on them,
You are the place from which they stem -
All faithful souls, all souls do take
And lead them to their final wake -
Infernal pains do take from them -
Show them the place from which they stem -
Tartaros neither, lion nor
Shall have their soul, shall have their corps -
Nor darkness them consume then shall,
The pit in which deep down they fell
Deliver them, O Lord, now from -
And all the ways they went upon
Which brought them far away from light
And led them into darkest night, -
From all that pain deliver us -
So that our hearts rejoice will thus.
Deliver us from exile far,
For all of us your children are!

Sed signifer sanctus Michael
repraesentet eas in lucem sanctam -
Quam olim Abrahae promisisti et semini eius.

Your people wait to follow thee,
Your light now we just need to see -
The standard held just high before
Saint Michael leading all the more,
All demons thrown away just all -
And saved we be from deepest fall,
As long you promised Abraham
To reach the land from which we came -
The light we see and year for now,
The light's the place wee need to go,
Your light, the only that will last,
Your light in future, present, past -
No time then holds, all time will fall,
Will fall each matter, fall just all,
The highest call to you we seek
And may we bee top meek and weak -
Yours truly - that is now so clear -
We are, and no one else is near.
Who else will help us from our plight?
Who else assist in this our fight?

Hostias et preces tibi, Domine, laudis offerimus:
Tu suscipe pro animabus illis,
quarum hodie memoriam facimus:
Fac eas, Domine, de morte transire ad vitam.

The sacrifice we make today
Shall show you we are on the way,
Are trying hard to get to you,
And all the pain goes through and through,
The pain grows deeper every day -
What are we still to you to say?
And praise thee giving, hear our plea -
The dead with you we long to see -
The praise we give the justly so
Will on and on forever go.
The grasp of death shall be released,
Resurge will all that are deceased.
From death to life let pass them all,
Not them eternal death befall -
The deeds are done, the paths went through,
Together stand now old and new,
Together old and new combined,
Together all are now inclined
To start anew, to raise again,
And sense just makes now all your plan.


Sanctus, Sanctus, Sanctus Dominus Deus Sabaoth!
Pleni sunt caeli et terra gloria tua. Hosanna in excelsis.
Benedictus qui venit in nomine domini. Hosanna in excelsis.

Now praise to thee be brought to see,
Just praise to whom the world shalt see,
Just praise to you with silent plea,
But praise be stronger than our plea.
For holy, Father, you alone,
And holy, Son, on equal throne,
Yea, holy, Spirit, all unite -
And all is filled with all your might,
Your might just filling every part
And caring strongly for each heart -
The hearts to thee we bring and sing
That not to vanity we cling
But thine be glory, praise and all,
Who savest us from darkest fall,
Hosanna! Calling, praise we thee,
Hosanna is the word to be -
Who cometh in the name of God
Shall blessèd be, forsaken not.
All human sacrifice is void
If not your will is here employed.

Agnus dei qui tollis peccata mundi: miserere nobis.
Agnus dei qui tollis peccata mundi: miserere nobis.
Agnus dei qui tollis peccata mundi: dona eis requiem.

O Lamb of God, our pleas do hear,
O Lamb of God, we know you're near,
O Lamb of God, all sins then take,
O Lamb of God, from sleep us wake,
O Lamb of God, from void us call,
O Lamb of God, in you is all,
O Lamb of God, thine is all worth,
O Lamb of God, who dwelt the Earth,
O Lamb of God, yours is all time,
O Lamb of God, your deeds are prime,
O Lamb of God, us for you died,
O Lamb of God, and death defied!
O Lamb of God, o tortured man,
O Lamb of God, from which we stem,
O Lamb of God, whom we evade,
O Lamb of God, who once us made,
O Lamb of God, have mercy then,
O Lamb of God, o don't us ban,
O Lamb of God, them rest now grant,
O Lamb of God, in promised land.


Lux aeterna luceat eis, Domine:
Cum sanctis tuis in aeternum: quia pius es.
Libera me, Domine, de morte aeterna, in die illa tremenda:
Quando caeli movendi sunt et terra:
Dum veneris iudicare saeculum per ignem.

Eternal light now shine for them,
Eternal light embrace now them,
Eternal light shall raise them high,
Eternal light defies all "why",
Defies all "who", all "what", all "when",
Defies all questions asked just then -
Eternal light do grant them now
As merciful your name and vow.
And me myself from death once spare -
From death eternal, from that lair,
This day when shake the world then will,
This day of wrath, when none stands still,
This day when fates are sealed and made,
This day when open stands the gate,
This day not them nor me let go,
Eternal light instead us show.
The tremors spare us, highest judge,
And spare for all of us the such -
Eternal rest do grant to them:
Deliver us to where we stem.

Tremens factus sum ego et timeo,
Dum discussio venerit atque ventura ira.
Quando caeli movendi sunt et terra.
Dies illa, dies irae, calamitatis et miseriae,
Dies magna et amara valde.
Dum veneris iudicare saeculum per ignem.

And trembling stand I now with fear,
And trembling as I sense you near,
But should I tremble, Father mine,
Should tremble I, o link divine?
What fear that surges now through me,
How wrong I know this now to be!
Have failed I, you will help me live,
Have trembled, hope and peace you give!
When heavens and the worlds will shake,
When trembling all's about to wake -
O hear me then, whom I ignored,
O stand me by, eternal Lord,
Deliver me, my Lord, this day,
This day, how fearsome feel it may,
This day of wrath, of sadness more,
For sad am I than long I tore
Your work asunder, grew apart!
But now returns to thee my heart,
This day of peace, this day of plight,
Rejoiceth all in all your light.


And all what's written cannot see,
And all what's said just small to be,
All comprehension steps aback,
All reason offering but lack -
There's nowhere peace be found - but there,
The place which is just Neverwhere -
Eternal light shines through it all,
Eternal peace in greatest call -
All life of matter bound to death,
All life of matter void just hath,
All life of matter empty so,
All life of matter needs to go -
No life of matter matter will -
If not it linked to you is still,
All land and sea and air and space,
All these so cared for earthly ways -
The end lays the beginning bare,
Await us will your greatest care -
No fear, no sadness, all gets still
When rest eternal give you will.

Requiem aeternam dona eis, Domine, et lux perpetua luceat eis.
Libera me, Domine, de morte aeterna, in die illa tremenda:
Quando caeli movendi sunt et terra:
Dum veneris iudicare saeculum per ignem.

January 20th / 31st, 2000

© Phil John Kneis. all rights reserved   · - internet diary · poetry · serial photography
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