POEMS GROUP 25: YOGA

Series 3: Continuities



  1. We All
  2. As I Listen to a Frog at Night
  3. As Night Is Falling
  4. The Fleeting Self
  5. Syllogy XLVIII: The Possibility of a Poem
  6. Down We Go
  7. Tyrannis (4)
  8. The Lost Art of Epistemology
  9. Traces of the Self Online
  10. Sometimes, There's Nothing To Say
  11. Dream within a Dream
  12. One Breath, One World, One Dream
  13. De Profundis (6)
  14. I Need to Believe (7)
  15. Sonnet IV: Floating on a Cloud of Sadness
  16. This Endless Chain
  17. Sonnet V: My Sleep Won't Come, The Darkness Has Arrived
  18. Sonnet VI: I Fear My Mind Has Given Up On Me
  19. Sonnet VII: My Muse Won't Speak To Me Tonight, I Fear
  20. The Wounds of Life
  21. Syllogy XLIX: Rest Mow



What's Related
Subsequent: Poems
Other Sites
 








Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES I:

WE ALL
Corvallis, April 28th, 2022 - P#773


we all
have hopes
we all
have dreams
we all
seek solace of the soul

for as we walk
in this valley of darkness
far too often
we're all alone
we're all, deep down,
a single being,
reaching out
for all our lives:
for all our sakes:
and though we try
the only certainty in birth
is death;
and all that happens in between
can only function
only work
can only guide us
only live
if there is hope

now
how do we
create hope
out of that?




April 23rd/26th, 2022









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES II:

AS I LISTEN TO A FROG AT NIGHT
Corvallis, May 8th, 2022 - P#774


a lonely frog
is calling in the night
the second night in a row
yet no answer is heard
so far

now,
I do not mind you
keeping me awake
filling the darkness
with the sound of life
and hoping for romance:

and I do hope
that this Romeo
will find his Juliet

and yet
I may never know:
allegedly,
she will keep quiet:
and so I will only hear Romeo's call
but not Juliet's response

thus as I listen to this frog at night
I very much appreciate
to hear
there is life
out there
other than humans:

for don't we take up too much space already?
and have we not lost our sense
of community
with everyone else?

thus I am thankful
to hear
that you seem to know
what you are doing:

for I certainly don't think
we humans know
anything at all
any more




May 8th/10th, 2022









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES III:

AS NIGHT IS FALLING
Corvallis, June 14th, 2022 - P#775


as night is falling
am I anticipating
war or peace?
salvation or disaster?

the borders between those
seem fluid now
both between
inside and out

the war within
our bodies, our selves
the war between
these bodies, these selves

and all of humanity
interlocked
in this deadly embrace
wanting
quite desperately so
for a respite
a break
just some rest

at last
as night is falling
can't we have that here
at least?

or have our dreams
turned to nightmares
forever?




June 14th, 2022









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES IV:

THE FLEETING SELF
Corvallis, July 4th, 2022 - P#776


sometimes
I seem to have forgotten
who I was
what I've done
who I am

I look at my work
sometimes with a sense
of incredulity:
how did this happen?
could I've really done this?
who was this me
that wrote all this,
said all this,
did all this?

I feel like a stranger to myself
and all is just a distant dream,
a distant memory, perhaps:
oh, surely, I do remember
eventually:
yet the incredulity
remains

and so I float
in the in-between
between past and future
one known, but dimming,
the other, unknowable:
look I
at my selves that were
hope and fear I
for my selves that will be:
and am utterly confused I
about my self
in this moment
so fleeting




June 14th, 2022









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES V:

SYLLOGY XLVIII:

(DODECALOGY, PART FIVE OF TWELVE)

Corvallis, July 20th, 2022 - P#777




I know there is something
that wants to emerge
to come out
to see the page
some words
have formed
or are still forming
I try to catch them
once they get loose:

will I capture them correctly?
in this stream of consciousness,
are there words I'm overlooking,
others, I pretend to see?

how will they sound? do they have a wish?
shall rhyme they, inside, outside,
in the end, in the beginning?
or should they float freely?
for rhyming is a tricky thing -
dictates some patterns it
that may perhaps distract
while, as it's hoped, elect
to sound in this specific way
where poets are supposed to say
things like they are an artifice
and while we do, don't we then miss
that all these games are just distractions:
agreement for agreement's sake
beauty, it's hoped, for beauty's own sake
so that, in the end,
such learnèd a person could demonstrate well
how dactyls can lead you to heaven or hell?

but what
do the words want?
what
does the poem want?

what's wanted
what's needed
is right here, right now,
some sense to be coming
and quickly!

so then?

Adorno once said
(yes, that's where I'm going!)
that after Auschwitz
there could not be any poems no longer:
a commandment he proceeded to later ignore
and why should we not
both listen
and then ignore:

poetry
at a certain point
will have to stop
and cease
and behold
and watch
just take in
just hover
in the air
of terror
of hell
of the utter impossibility
of thinking poetically:
for there are times
when poetry
must stand and quietly weep:
and watch closely
and just
be a witness:

so that after
that which lacks all language
after that which is, should, must be unspeakable
words shall
once again
roar
and spout
and scream out
and howwwwwwwl
and weep, eventually

for the human condition
was just violated
while the words were silent
and something else in us
something unspeakable
was doing the talking:
yet again

and art
was witness
our soul
(for art is our very soul,
it speaks to it, hears it, lives in it)
our very dear soul
is violated
by this life here
on earth
amongst this hell
of own our making:

yes: it is us
who bring this about
this
perversion
of what it should mean
to be a human

and so
am I sitting here
at night
during the night of our life
in one of our quite darkest moments
am I really sitting here, quietly, asking?
you tell me, oh Muse:
I ask you, like my ancestor in spirit asked once before:
ἄνδρα μοι ἔννεπε, μοῦσα,
tell me, o muse, of a man
tell me, maybe, of all us humans
and how we are supposed to be able to live
in times like these
in times but lightest
in times but darkest
at the same time:

so as I am sitting here
in this, all our night
in the garden of Gethsemane,
when asking
about the possibility of a poem,
the poem is asking me instead
about the possibility of humanity

and I shall weep
for in this here moment
I simply have no answer to give
and the words stay silent once more




June 20th, 2022

Image: Cool Sunrise. Credit: ESA/NASA/Thomas Pesquet.









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES VI:

DOWN WE GO
Corvallis, July 31st, 2022 - P#778


/

as we go now
down
this
path
down this path
of confrontation
conflagration
contestation
and of pain all:

know we all
how this will end but?
know we all
how this remakes
all that we are
all that we were
all that we'll be?

all that will be
will be a shadow
thrown upon the wall of our cave
by this but ghastly flame
of fiery destruction
of a nothingness
that cannot create
that can just destroy
annihilate all
that stands
in this path
of madness all

//

and yet,
shall madness be allowed to reign
and cast more shadows,
sow more pain?

if indeed
a different kind of madness
could stand up
against the madness of destruction:
shan't we be glad
that this may well bring
an end to these tidings
of horror and death all?

a war, to end all war?
a war, to end all peace?
a peace, to end all peace?
we've heard this before

///

glad we may be;
yet temper that feeling we must:
for something may creep out
emerge
from the victorious spirit
quite different a spell
too blind
to the loss
that already happened:
roads bridges houses offices and churches
limbs and torsos heads hearts blood
books and movies architecture music
all the depth of history
and culture
the life
of all peoples, all nations, all dreams

and all
or part
asunder
now:

// //

hell holds a special place
for those who ordered this to happen
for those
who let the dying just go on
for those
who don't come to the aid of the victims:
for all of us
who care just little
us, who we've learned
to ignore the news
when we
don't feel
we should care

have gotten used we
to the slaughter
and death
all around us?

whatever happened
to "never again"?
whatever happened
to "we're all united"?
whatever happened
to "peace on Earth"?

far too many places now
most in the past
some but in the present
still
others
being prepared for right now:

pray, tell, what about our future then?




July 31st, 2022









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES VII:

TYRANNIS

(DODECALOGY, PART FOUR OF TWELVE)

Corvallis, July 31st, 2022 - P#779




what do we tell
the tyrants
of present and future
who rejoice in bringing us war
and refuse us the peace
we are owed?

sic semper

and may it take years:
a life lived in freedom
is worth so much more
than one under the yoke
of the tyrant,
of lies, of submission, of falsehood:
one you have tasted
a life, lived by standards your own,
how could you go back
to the terror
of the tyrant?

and yet:
a life
is a life:
even without hope:
but what kind of life would that be?

and thus
tyrants shall be repaid
for their service:
for showing us
the path
not to be taken

and to all those that defend the innocent,
and who stand up against this aggression:
may you succeed:
for tyranny
shall never
win
again:

і всім, хто захищає невинних,
і які протистоять цій агресії:
нехай вдасться тобі:
тому що тиранія
ніколи не повинен
виграти
знову




July 31st, 2022









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES VIII:

THE LOST ART OF EPISTEMOLOGY
Corvallis, July 31st, 2022 - P#780


shall we think about this now?
shall we make
a solid effort
to inform ourselves, to search,
and to analyze
quite fully
what it is
we want to know,
and why we'd want it,
how we'd do it,
what our limitations be -

sure, we could

but how much quicker
how much simpler
how much more sordid
would it be
to just assume
to just pretend
to let our guts
and not our brains
determine now
just what is real
and what is fake

and don't we ever
question then
our preconceptions
or conclusions:

thus choose we now simplicity
as new-born simpletons
connected all
to noise
and knowledge:
not knowing one
from the other
any longer




July 31st, 2022









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES IX:

TRACES OF THE SELF ONLINE
Corvallis, August 3rd, 2022 - P#781


I remembered someone from times ago
and looked them up
online at night
I guess that's what you do now
bits and pieces only
mixed in with those from other people
a strangest catalog
of arbitrary things
and traces most eclectic
looked up myself as well, of course,
found things I wrote that I can't remember any longer
and what I mostly do
was hardly visible

what a strange unsorted thing
this world wide web
our lives through a blender
all mixed and mashed
thrashed and trashed
lost and found,
but mostly, lost

not the best way
to feed my nostalgia
and my memory
of different times
of different people
different places
and overall,
a different me

and thus
our fragmentary lives
our fragmentary being
randomly, almost, assembled
in this graveyard
of moments past
and times so fleeting

and after all this time has passed,
no matter who, no matter when,
I'd welcome back the past
so eagerly
with each passing year

as time is running out
I know:
nothing and no one comes back
just like that:
and the moments, cherished or not,
nostalgia now welcomes them all:
and all those fragments, those moments, those people:
images just, some words, some sounds, even smells
all in my memory
till it all dims
and fades away:

and maybe, some traces will remain
online
whatever that means

and is truly this
our telos
our end
our destination
for the future?

shadows of our selves
or even mere fragments of shadows
lingering
in the electronic maze
till they
too
will finally
fade?

thus
who will care
in the end?




August 3rd/5th, 2022









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES X:

SOMETIMES, THERE'S NOTHING TO SAY
Corvallis, August 14th, 2022 - P#782


sometimes, there's nothing to say
not that there wouldn't be anything
to talk about:

for I could say all I want,
but talking about it, would that not imply
a social component?

so shall I cry
out loud
into the wilderness?

for I really feel
like screaming
out loud:

and yet, who listens
in this world of so much noise
and little attention?

for everything we may care about
is known already, and hanging over us all
in deafening silence

do hear we or not?
wrong question,
my dear

want we to hear?
if there would be nothing, or almost nothing,
we could be doing?

thus sometimes I feel,
I'd only remind people of their own impotence:
and who, pray tell, wants to hear that?

and thus, sometimes, my heart's so heavy with the pain of the world,
I cry in silence, shall not speak, and calmly look at the oncoming storm
that no one else has the stomach to see any longer

but I won't stay silent forever




August 14th, 2022









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES XI:

DREAM WITHIN A DREAM
Corvallis, August 29th, 2022 - P#783


dreams are coming through already
pushing themselves
into waking hour
daydream figures
appear they
questioning
my reality
in this moment:

their time shall come
as I slowly rush, prepare to succumb
to this realm of dreams
and nightmares alike:

I shall surrender
unsure what dreams will come:
I only know:
I will be certain about their reality
once under their spell
(with few exceptions though)
and while I know
what's real is real
just sometimes
I become suspicious:
for I have dreamed within a dream
and woken up to wake again:
will one day then
I find
that what seemed real
was yet another dream,
and who will I find
the dreamer to be?




August 29th, 2022









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES XII:

ONE BREATH, ONE WORLD, ONE DREAM
Corvallis, September 20th, 2022 - P#784


is it not curious
how things can change
in mere a moment:
in barely a breath
can lie the difference
between hero and coward, genius and fool,
life also and death:

lies within this mere breath
a chance
quite literally
for fresh air,
but, as it is hoped,
a new idea as well:

just one breath
can mark this moment
in its tension 'tween meaning and insignificance:
your body will do the breathing just fine
but to connect your breath
your body
to your mind
and open it up
to new ideas
is up to us:

and for as long
as we can see importance
in this tension
we can proclaim: we're still alive:
throughout this life, we shall create
what we create in this awareness but
shall be filled
with more life
than ever before:
shall be more alive
than ever before
shall be more connected
than ever before

in this exercise though
we should not limit our selves
to mere a body
mere a breath:
the life that flows through us
the dream that lives in us
is not about our mortal coil
but about what transcends
this shape, this body:

shall focus on the spirit we
the soul, the ideas, the dreams that connect
for we don't just live in our bodies of now
we also live
in our ideas, our stories, our dreams
transcending this moment:
just as within us
others' ideas, stories, and dreams
are living in us
connecting us
to near and far
past and future
in this mere temporary
present

thus breathe
and think
and feel
and know, hear, see
and wake:

for breath means life
and life means choices
and one single breath indeed
is all it takes
to stay in this life
till the next one




September 18th-20th, 2022









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES XIII:

DE PROFUNDIS

(DODECALOGY, PART SIX OF TWELVE)

Corvallis, September 30th, 2022 - P#785


I

I decided to follow my feeling now
some thoughts were circling all around me
tried to catch them, let them settle
thus I sat down
in this night
deep down
wishing, eventually, that dreams deep down
would not yet again turn into nightmares
again and again
alas, I felt something weighing on me
pushing me down
profoundly so
into the depths

I realized this,
and decided, foolishly,
to call out
de profundis, out of these depths,
you understand
the image, I presume
(precociously, I fear)





II

thus out of these depths
am I calling,
but for what, for whom, and with what purpose?





III

De profundis clamavi ad te (Domine)
out of the depths have I called to you,
I want you to listen,
but cannot call you lord -
my modernity stands in the way
(or is just humility? or arrogance?
for how to proclaim to know God at all?)

Speravit anima mea in Domino
has placed my soul its hope in the Lord
(in the promise of a lord, a savior, ruler, teacher)?
are we hoping maybe too much
that someone could save us,
someone redeem us,
someone make new what was old,
fix what was broken,
turn alive what has died,
and fill with spirit those who have lost it?

Quia apud Dominum misericordia et copiosa apud eum redemptio:
for with the Lord is mercy and copious redemption:
and only with him (or them)?
if mercy is the property of divinity,
and redemption follows out of it,
then without divinity, no mercy, and never redemption?





IV

(I had to literally get up to attend to my headache)
(was caused it by my brain, my heart, my soul)
(there it is again)





V

do I believe divinity needs a dominion, a Lord?
quite certainly, no!
do I believe mercy is tied to divinity?
for certainly,
to forgive is so divine,
most humans have trouble granting it

in any case,
it seems
that in my search for something profound
seeing an image in my head still I am

and yet,
I know:
whatever Lord may be called for in those prayers:
it certainly is not a human one





VI

quite certainly,
we do not understand divinity

(how could we though, by definition)
(and yet, propose we human implications)
(but we don't need a human Lord)

who is it then
we're calling out towards?

it's not that complicated
if you know
how to read
between the lines
of this song of hopeful ascent





VII

ad te:
all we need
is someone to talk to,
and one who will listen
and see us
and love us
just as we are

misericordia:
someone who sees us
in all our misery
and takes it to their heart
and embraces us
with compassion
lovingly
and kindly

redemptio:
someone who allows us
to simply try again
to revise what was wrong
to get a fresh start
to be redeemed
in spite of all our mistakes:
for love
never gives up





VIII

yet of course,
divinity
is quite an abstract idea:
and certainly,
we have not met
personally
with such an abstraction:

thus our divinity
shall be more concrete
and what we need of others,
we shall instead
be giving to them:

for once we all
see both the humanity and the divinity
within each other,
we see ourselves
person to person
with all our compassion
seeking redemption
for all

now, is that profound,
or just all-too simple?





IX

but in all this simplicity,
should really we claim
to be able to reduce divinity
to humanity?
and elevate humanity
to divinity?

I fear
I am underestimating
the profundity
of the divine

but just for the sake
of argument:

in all our need for the divine
are seeking we utility,
a quid pro quo,
or do ut des?
a tit for tat,
I give, so you shall give as well?

are children we
in need of a parent?
(sometimes, certainly, I feel that we are)

for here,
in our desire to ascend,
are seeking we someone
to sweep in
to do all the work
for us
like a god
out of the machine
of heaven?
our personal lord and savior,
how selfish does this sound sometimes -
a personal servant maybe,
so we can nail them to a cross
like we seem to prefer to do?
pile our sorrows, guilt and failures
on a scapegoat
sent out into the wilderness
to die?

or maybe,
are asking we
for understanding,
for seeking a path,
for guidance,
for help?
a teacher, a helper,
to hold our hand
as we follow them?

or are calling we
towards ourselves
to be challenged
and examined
by this life we are given,
to realize
that while divinity, this Lord of Lords,
escapes our view,
it still can guide us
if we listen
down
into our selves?

for if we are made
in Thy image,
we should have the path
laid out already
within ourselves:

and yet
while I would like this to be true:
I look upon the world
and sigh

for whatever lies
profoundly
within our selves:
we are quite skilled
at not finding it





X

thus still,
out of the depths,
I keep calling
waiting
for someone to listen,
perchance






September 30th, 2022









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES XIV:

I NEED TO BELIEVE

(DODECALOGY, PART SEVEN OF TWELVE)

Corvallis, October 9th, 2022 - P#786


I need to believe
that beneath all this sorrow
beneath all this pain
and all this senseless senselessness
is waiting a future time
much better than the current one
waiting
to be born
out of
all
this

I need to believe
because without this belief
there would be nothing
keeping me
from seeking madness
rather than sanity
and desperation
rather than resilience
and resignation
rather than defiance

I need to believe
so that others can see
the power of hope,
the power of love,
the power of faith
in the inevitability
of the coming utopia:
the kind
that sits in our hearts and minds
and gently tells us,
"no more" of this madness
"no more" of this anti-love
"no more" of this anti-hope:

I need to believe
that this utopia of the soul
is indeed all within us
a liberation
waiting
patiently impatiently
to be born
inside of us:
and once it's there,
to forever be nurtured
and to be spread
from soul to soul
from mind to mind

I need to believe
that I am not the only one
seeking the power of peace:

but I do believe
that in this imperfect world
utopia should always be our destination for sure
but the path towards it
shall hold some darker truths in tow
and senselessness is anti-sense,
is entropy in human form:
for I do know, and I have seen, and I have heard:
in order to wake
we need to be able
to distinguish the dreams
from the nightmares
and, sadly, we need both
to keep us
on our path, it seems






October 9th, 2022









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES XV:

SONNET IV
FLOATING ON A CLOUD OF SADNESS


Corvallis, October 10th, 2022 - P#787



floating on a cloud of sadness
as I seek to nod and smile:
have I done so for a while?
try I might to hide my madness

first of all from my own thinking
yet I know my self too well:
can't one's heart just always tell?
whether rising, whether sinking,

there are things we will not fathom,
even if they're crystal clear:
hide we well our greatest fear?
some reflection's never welcome

thus I shall embrace my sorrow,
thus I shall embrace my sorrow, and befriend it still tomorrow






October 10th, 2022









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES XVI:

THIS ENDLESS CHAIN
Corvallis, October 13-24th, 2022 - P#788


— with thanks to Carl Sagan and J. Michael Straczynski —



how can it be
that we've lost the connection
to what it is
that keeps us alive:

are living we lives
so cruelly detached
from all that has mattered
since time without end?

are seriously some
believing
that a mere distorting of bodies
can bring them connection
with the eternal
that they should be seeking?

"I" am
but one part
of a larger whole -
an individual, no less,
composed of myriads of other beings,
with cells regenerating and repairing,
not a single thing will be the same of me
after some time:
but if my cells and fellow travelers all change,
who is this me, and what does this mean?

and all this material
all we are made of,
all comes it from stars,
from far away
in space and through time:
for star stuff we are
and we will become it
again
and
again

in all these clear material connections,
can't see we then
the implications?
aren't all we just
a mass of bodies
separated from each other, mostly,
with minds, maybe souls,
searching, endlessly,
quite desperately sometimes,
for a connection,
any connection -
while overlooking quite
the obvious
that's all around us:

for we
are already one
in this shared experience
of lives lived
whether in sequence or in simultaneity:

we are
of the universe
which cycles through us
discovers through us
feels through us
thinks through us
learns through us
hopes through us
dreams through us
wakes through us
lives through us
loves through us:

and in this endless chain
of beings connected
through all of time
and all of space:

aren't one we not, and still refuse to see?






October 24th, 2022









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES XVII:

SONNET V
MY SLEEP WON'T COME, THE DARKNESS HAS ARRIVED


Corvallis, October 29th, 2022 - P#789



my sleep won't come, the darkness has arrived
my mind's still racing, news are coming in -
no chance to look away, the world's in pain:
and all asunder torn for which we've strived

I'm told by reason still within my brain
that I can't do a thing to make this end:
my agony will not this darkness bend -
I hear this: yet, such thinking is in vain

do secretly I wish to carry this?
desire I to suffer in my soul
as punishment for others suff'ring more?

am choosing I to stare down the abyss?
just small a part I am of this here whole:
and all too strange now seems my nightly chore






October 29th, 2022









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES XVIII:

SONNET VI
I FEAR MY MIND HAS GIVEN UP ON ME


Corvallis, October 30th, 2022 - P#790



I fear my mind has given up on me
as thoughts are turning all around inside
connections somewhat aimlessly collide
and what once clear now harder is to see

just as the sea will smoothen out my track
should veering to it walk I on the beach
a lesson nature gladly wants to teach:
from entropy, there is no turning back

I'll fight to keep whatever strength I have
while seeing though that all just disappears
and bit by bit, I notice how I fade

and yet, all ain't not lost, as cling I to my staff
and pull myself up frowning at my fears:
face with defiance what we can't evade






October 30th/31st, 2022









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES XIX:

SONNET VII
MY MUSE WON'T SPEAK TO ME TONIGHT, I FEAR


Corvallis, November 1st, 2022 - P#791



my muse won't speak to me tonight, I fear
already I have sat here all in vain
and scribbled, scrabbled, scrubbed words all the same
as pace around I blaming far and near

a writer writes: assumedly that's true,
and yet, it's just the outcome of a dance:
macabre it is - sometimes, alas, perchance
a thought will come to make the world anew.

I fear my muse is mad at me sometimes,
for though she pushes, idle I may be,
and let the words be silent for too long.

eventually, some words will fill these lines
pretend I shan't that all that's due to me
a siren like my muse will guide my song






November 1st/4th, 2022









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES XX:

THE WOUNDS OF LIFE
Corvallis, November 4th, 2022 - P#792


life teaches us
little lessons
little wounds
we acquire throughout
our journey

so
do we appreciate
being taught
so painfully
meticulously
and, indeed, quite personally?

and what
after being taught
do we actually
care
to learn?

is pain
indeed
the master we seek,
or the master we need,
or no master at all?

and as we stumble
through the ruins of hopes, dreams and desires,
do we still feel?
can we keep the cold
from creeping in?

and even if
the wounds of life
may be the price of joy:
may be the call-out for humanity:
in this strangely sado-masochistic dance:
how much, pray tell,
can we expect
to be able to carry?
and at which point
do we call out:
אלי
אלי
:למה עזבתני

"My God, my God, why have You forsaken me?"






November 4th, 2022









Phil John Kneis:

योग (YOGA) - CONTINUITIES XXI:

SYLLOGY XLIX:



Corvallis, November 13th-17th, 2022 - P#793




/


rest now
at the end of your day
your work is not finished,
your sorrows still haunt you
but rest now
the world is in chaos
and hope is diminished
but rest now
there is no "normality"
and all here is changing
so rest now


//


rest
pause
take stock
and contemplate:

be silent
be still
and don't
say a word

(you may want to
a bit later,
hopefully,
after your silence)

but for now
just rest
just breathe in
and let it all
be here
around you
and see it all
be here
inside you
and know it
and now
breathe out
and let it out
still around
not within
and see it all
again:

and see the connections
and see the obstructions
and yet
just rest
and stay
with your being
in this world


///


now see:
far too often
do we just simply
react
in this culture of immediacy:

but sometimes
we should
just be
just be here
and be just
to your self
and be just
to the world
to see it
just as it is
to do justice
to what to expect
and be at peace
when the world is at war
all around us

so all of us
let us just be
and let our mind
our soul
our essence
breathe in
breathe out
and
know
hear
see:

only when we see after having seen our self
can we truly see the other as part of us,
a soul, shared, connected:

a community
of the living
a connection
a union
a joining

connect
with what animates us
with what makes us both whole and part
with that which transcends us
whether human we are,
or animal, plant, fungus, or microbe,
animate, inanimate, or artificial:
see all those around us
and shows us
in all humility:

all our souls
are one
all our souls
are connected
just as our bodies
are one
on this planet
in a universe
of life

and we, ourselves,
just a small part:
and yet
always significant


// //


so rest now
and know:
it has not been in vain

let this be a rest
that can just as much look forward
to another possible day
just as much as one
that can only look backwards any more
and see:

and understand now:
whatever was, already happened
whatever will be, we may never see

whatever needed doing, was done
whatever life possible, was lived
whatever justice be helped, it was
whatever love you could give, you did
and whatever love you needed, you saw
hopefully all, even for briefest a moment

but understand as well:
whatever still is, the time is now
and your watch may not be over yet:
and possibilities
may still be turned
into realities

that way, peace of mind
may be harder to find
if the now
should demand accounting:
don't give in
you'll do it tomorrow,
and you'll rest
in the hope
of resolution
and a future
still to come

hopefully,
next year, if not sooner,
maybe in Jerusalem


// / //


so rest now
whether there is another day to come
or not:

but be sure
that such a consideration
will not weigh too heavily
on your heart


so when your breath shall leave you
one final time
the thought of rest
shall it fill you with calmness, not dread,
so that you can finally be
at peace





November 17th, 2022

Image: The planet Saturn, viewed by NASA's Cassini spacecraft during its 2009 equinox. Credit: NASA/JPL/Space Science Institute.