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  phase 2: peri ta horizomena

POEMS GROUP 11: CONFESSIO

Category 3: Fights

Section Index


  1. Vanity
  2. No Way Out
  3. Ennealogy IX: Closure


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Phil John Kneis:
CONFESSIO - FIGHTS I:
VANITY
Berlin, April 29th, 1999 - P#98

I.
All odds against,
The mind now lanced
At once for all
To win it all.

II.
And all seems calm,
By this my palm,
By this my hand
The fate must bend.

III.
But what am I?
Am passing by,
Returning then?
Or fade, no plan?

IV.
Is substance all?
Or must it fall?
No things, just dust,
Then vanish must!

V.
And void so stark,
In lightened dark
Just dwarfs my mind
And sees me blind.

VI.
My efforts then
Are void again.
In vain all fight?
But win we might.



PJK
April 30th, 1999 / May 5th 1999 (Correction)







Phil John Kneis:
CONFESSIO - FIGHTS II:
NO WAY OUT
Berlin, May 3rd, 1999 - P#99

I.
All seems calm but empty but,
All my senses almost shut,
All I see is shadows' play,
All I cross a blockèd way.

II.
All now falls apart within,
All of deepest inner kin,
All together, not apart -
All in vain, but somehow smart.

III.
Sounds I hear and sights I see,
Answers then I use to flee,
Cannot stand them, shut my mind -
But the truth comes from behind.

IV.
Am afraid to face my fear,
Am afraid to come it near -
All the preaches I once held
Come aback, their words are felt.

V.
Come to rest is what I want,
But my eyes still face the front,
Face the masquerade of life -
Face it, hoping they will thrive.

VI.
Seeing me from quite outside,
Laughing almost at my plight,
Am compelled to cry out loud -
That for us there's no way out.



PJK
May 5th, 1999







Phil John Kneis:
CONFESSIO - FIGHTS III:
CLOSURE
(ENNEALOGY, PART NINE OF NINE)
Eichwalde, December 30th, 2000 - P#143

I.
The words that flow an end demand
The words that flow united stand
And stand in unison once more -
The quarrels which till now them tore
Apart they went and died in vain
And nevermore shall rise again -
And nevermore to find they seem
And neverwhen they form the theme:
And fires all forgotten here
And old beliefs so built on fear
While fear the weakest link so much
Whilst holding all in strongest touch
And grasp so strong it burns inside
And fire now with utter might
Will strike again and must get heard -
And everyone who well once fared
Now down the road in darkest days
Will face all bravely uttered nays
And closure seek - again - in vain -
And nothing now can stay just sane.

II.
So fire lives again and burns
And all reflection dark now turns
And lights the flame deep down this all -
That everything may face its fall
And shalt discover truth from lies
And shalt now see what sweet disguise
And shallow masks them led once here:
And evermore, there stays just fear,
And evermore, it's all there'll be -
And nothing here so keen to see
What truth may be and lead to light -
What lies beneath now come to sight -
What's hidden all now must appear
And shed may be another tear
But nevermore the times now past
Return then should and ever last:
The past is past, the now is now
And truth before it is to bow -
And not a single soul gets lost
And not a single spark now tossed.

III.
And closure now the task ahead
And closure not a warmest bed
And closure not a home well-build
And closure not a cup well-filled,
And closure not for comfort here -
And closure won't dry every tear -
So all what's said will now get heard
And old dominions may get stirred
And old convictions now get probed
And everything for which we hoped
And everything beneath the sky
Will face this test and needn't try
To finally get things now done -
The time is up, the chances gone:
And closure now a cut will be
And closure deepest end will see
And closure all will face at last
And closure knows no deepest past
For past and future now collide:
In present times, now starts this fight.

IV.
And time now running out so fast,
The thoughts to think will pound at last
And nothing here will have more time -
And worldly goods aren't worth a dime
And all irrelevant a shine
Gets lost, ignored, both yours and mine,
And nothing here retains its worth -
And death is nothing but a birth
And all accumulated here
And all what far once now gets near
And deeds from ages past arrive
Together, all will lose - or thrive -
Together all, no sep'rate fight,
Together now, one single light -
And all which hovers here above
And all which thinks itself so tough
Will crash, ignite and go to hell -
A hell to which themselves they fell,
A hell of man - and built by them -
And back they go to live again.

V.
And all remains in nothingness
And nothing here is worth now less -
And nothing all - and all so vain -
And all rejoices from this strain:
And thoughts unleashed which new and old,
Together all, and truth be told,
Together always, all days through -
Together all the days we grew,
Together all what thought apart -
And finally, a single heart
And nothing separates us here -
For nothing now incites a fear
And fire just what called here life
In dreams together now we thrive -
And dreams deep down no more a fright
And dreams deep down now show a light -
And light and shadow here are one -
And all what feared before in stun
Transcend it will and closure find -
And see at last what lurks behind.

VI.
The words to write, the words to say,
The words to see another day,
The words and names the world create -
And since beginnings never fade,
The word that once create all did
Will finally show all its wit
And all collapse again, enfold,
And all the tales by words so told
Will come together finally
And finally, the truth shall see -
And nothing separates them then
And words their names will eat again -
And all the speeches down to one
And discourse now gets here just done -
And closure now a word to be
And closure not a thing to see
And closure so inside this all
And closure neither buildings tall
Nor highest plans not brought to light -
And now anew, new words incite.



PJK
December 30th, 2000





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